(This came in an email to Jeff, in response to his email to her.)
[T]he work is so good . . . even when absolutely nothing
comes of it (this week). I was basically
in Germany this week Dad, haha. Nada. A story? Man, this week was so slow; I don’t have a whole
bunch of stories, but I guess I can tell you one...
This one day had been especially slow. Nothing was going on.
In fact, we probably wasted a little bit of time just wandering because we were
so lost as to what to do. Night came, however, and we were helping a woman in
our ward with her YW activity. We went to the YW activity and everything was
just dandy. We were heading home when we
got a phone call from J.
FLASHBACK: We met J my first day here. I felt like we should
knock one particular door and so we did and this cute lady immediately let us
in (doesn’t happen). We had a pretty solid lesson with her. It wasn’t amazing,
but it was definitely solid. Her husband
had even joined us about half way through. She enjoyed our message and invited
us back. We started teaching her and A. It wasn’t long before we realized that
she was interested and he was not. He just liked to Bible bash us. (In Spanish,
so it isn’t really Bible bashing—it is more like him preaching at us and us not
knowing what he said, and so, just moving on, haha). We were both kind of bummed
because we knew she couldn’t progress unless he was on board because that is
just how the Latin culture is. One day we stopped by and J was alone. She told
us how A was a very jealous man and how she didn’t have feelings for him, but
she had nowhere to go. But he abused her and wouldn’t let her associate with
other people, etc., etc. Terrible situation.
Back to the story. We got a phone call from J. She called us
saying she had left A. They had been watching some kids and he severely harmed
the children (I won’t even tell you) and her, also. They got into a big fight
and she decided to leave. She called us in tears because all her family is in Honduras
and she has absolutely no friends and had nowhere to stay the night. We were
the only people she knew. My heart was 1000% broken. It was late at night and
we couldn’t get a hold of anyone with which she could stay. She wasn’t allowed
to stay with us. We had to call her and tell her that we couldn’t help her.
Both I and Hermana Parry sat in Hermana T's car and just cried. There was
nothing we could do and we felt so terrible.
It was then that I realized why people say a mission is
hard. It isn’t the long hours or the blazing heat or being away from your
family. It is wanting to help and having only human capacity. It hit me like a
wave that I was a 19-year-old girl and there was no way I could do this. No
way. I could not do this alone. I got home and just poured my heart out to
Heavenly Father. Most people think that when you pray that sincerely then you are
just blessed immediately. That was not the case. This week was hard. Not like
my attitude; I was happy and such, but just doors were not opening, people were
avoiding us, the works. Sometimes, God has to put you through the fire to see
how much you are willing to do. Even though the work is hard right now, it is
so good at the same time. You know that "sweet to the taste, bitter to the
belly" thing? That, but the opposite. This next week is going to be filled
with so many good things! I can just feel it! The Lord is going to bless us
this week, I just know it. As missionaries, we just have to rely on the
Atonement, always.
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